On the Horizon
by Larry Foster
As one listens to clergy, according to Rabbi Edwin Friedman, it becomes clearer that the stories told are similar whether the person be a priest, nun, minister, rabbi, or pastor. What seems to unite us in the church at this level is not necessarily our theology, but the common experience of dealing with the human phenomenon, particularly our families, our congregations, and our personal lives.
From a natural systems perspective, the family in some form is the ecumenical experience we all have. This goes beyond culture, gender, race, and many conventional dichotomies. Families anywhere face the same emotional process, which connects us across generations. Murray Bowen saw life as interconnected, grounded in creation along with all forms of life. In his search for a science of human behavior, Bowen developed a way of thinking that has universal appeal, depth, and integrative power beyond conventional cause-and-effect thinking in the "post-modern" age. The theory promotes maturity and management of anxiety. It focuses on strength rather than pathology. It takes into account a large picture of relationships while providing for individual variations. The theory offers strategies based on one's "being" rather than learning "technique."
The natural systems approach to clergy leadership and family issues is not learned in a conference, from a book, or through brief study. It is "organic" to the day-by-day process of human relationships. Learning this way of thinking relies on a more traditional mentoring, coaching style. In this sense it cannot be packaged or cloned. It is a maturity venture which often leads to better functioning, clearer boundaries, less stress, taking personal responsibility, and more resiliency.
As interest grows from those who begin to hear this way of thinking, leaders working on their own self-differentiation are offering an alternative way of thinking alongside conventional approaches. As the marketplace puts out a variety of products to address the "family" issue, natural systems theory can become a key in preparing clergy, parents, and presidents for their own family work and leadership. Resources are available to help leaders in times of increasing planetary demands and family challenges.